Ghosts of Christmas Past...

So another Christmas has come and gone. I got some pretty fucking sweet swag this year... Two things from my list! YES! O.C. Season 2 from Joey and The Complete Calvin & Hobbes from my Ma. Turns out she actually does like me! My girl got me Fox & the Hound on DVD and 90's Trivial Pursuit. What a hard fucking game that is! Holy shit... I thought I paid attention in the 90's and I was so fucking wrong. I guess the only things I was paying attention to was how can I score more beer and who was bogarting my muthafuckin j. Wow wow wow. So hard.

Yet as another Xmas has passed I can't help but remember all the cool gifts I got in the past... Maybe it's just that nostalgic Christmas feeling or maybe I am just bored and feel like writing. Anyhoo let's stroll down memory lane together and look at my top 3 Christmas toys from the past...

1) Sectaurs



Anyone else remember these crazy bugmen that rode these big fuckin bugs? They were the Warriors of Symbion and wow were they ever cool. What with their serial like TV ads that presented the ever unfolding saga of the Shining Realm of Prosperon, locked in mortal combat with the Dark Domain of Synax. Me and Tyler got one each one year and battled all Xmas morning with them. They were made by Coleco which I always thought was weird, and mine was Weapons Expert Pinsor and his Battle Beetle. One of the coolest things was that you could slide your hand into a glove that was underneath the bug-mount to simulate it creepy crawly legs and activate it's giant pinchers which were just big enough to grab your siblings by the arm and pinch them really friggin hard. How can you go wrong with a toy that has a weapon that is a weapon? Fucking sweet!

2) Lazer Tag



PREPARE TO ENTER THE LAZER TAG ACADEMY! This stuff was the shit! All you get to start with is a Starlite pistol, a StarSensor and some dumb fucking belt / bandoleer thingy but you could buy so much more! A rifle! A helmet! A super keen padded vest! And of course the best part was it encouraged you to shoot other people! I can remember running around the backyard with this clunky belt strap shooting at my lil bro who was also shooting away trying to be the first to score the kill. Then we moved to setting up the StarSensor and seeing how accurate a shot we are, with quick draws and shit. Way better than that knock-off half-baked Photon toy set that tried to steal Lazer Tags mojo. That game taught me all about marksmanship, so if the day ever comes where I shoot someone with stunning accuracy to save your life? Don't thank me, thank Lazer Tag.

3) Talking K.I.T.T.



Now to be fair this one was Tylers present but we all played with it. It was a big Knight Industries Two Thousand or K.I.T.T.. When you pushed the license plate on the back it would say snazzy phrases like "I shall activate the Turbo Boost" and "Scanners indicate danger ahead". It also came with a big ass David Hasselhoff figure to drive around and fight crime with. How can you go wrong with that? Mr. Baywatch immortalized in plastic for all eternity. And the hair was replicated with such detail... oh God the hair...

Well that's all of them for now... Maybe I'll run a post soon about all the other toys I wanted for Christmas or birthdays but never managed to get my greedy little hands on.

- R